Conversation with Mr. Potter and Co.

Me: Geez these previews are endless. (Snarfs down two Dots from giant sized box in purse)
Previews: La, la, la... fantasy movie (film breaks here so I never learn what it is, but it looked really good)... another Jason Bourne film... a movie about the Loch Ness Monster...
Me: I'm losing the will to live.
Projector: Creeeeeek. Break.
Me: I've got to pee. And the movie hasn't even started. (asks woman behind me to save my seat)
Projector:
Projector:
Me: Thanks lady. (eat more Dots. Decide I can really tell difference in the colors. Seriously)

Harry Potter and the Order of the Phoenix: (SPOILER ALERT.....)


Dudley with a really bitchin' thick silver chain. Harry all dark and angsty. Order of Phoenix all dark and angsty. Scenery all dark and angsty. Dumbledore all dark and angsty. Hogwarts all dark and angsty. Sirius Black all dark and angsty and amazing hot looking since it's Gary Oldman. He who can not be named still lacking a nose. (marvels that it's Ralph Fiennes under there) Emma Thompson making too brief of an appearance. A delightful actress playing evil Dolores Umbridge. Lots o' glass breaking. Pacing, pacing, pacing - mad torrid pacing. (Another handful of Dots) Harry's first kiss (Mulls over the whole Harry running around starkers in Equus) A quick peek at the giant. Some centaurs. The Weasly boys kick ass. (Forces self to stop with the Dots) Mr. Weasly in the quickest torture scene ever.) Lots of Harry dreaming. (Imagines agent Michelle telling JK Rowling to stop being so meditative and get on with it) More dark. More angst. (Reminds self that this was a 900 page book for god's sake and am amazed that it's only about 2 hours long) A little Kreacher. An over the top whatsherface ( you know, that British actress; I think she played Ophelia once. And for good reason) playing Bellatrix and looking like she'd escaped from a Tim Burton film rather than Azkaban.

Me: In all, I'd give it 3 out of 4 Dots.

Til next time...