So yeah, it's my annual literary gift to the world time. The VERY FIRST THING I ever wrote was a 5 act Thanksgiving play. Yes, 'tis true. 2nd Grade. Brenneman Elementary School in Chicago. I got my friends to perform it with me. We played multiple roles. The Pilgrims came from Holland. (this is actually historically accurate, although why I knew this is a HUGE mystery.) Mostly they were concerned about washing their clothes. I don't know why. They just were, okay? Who the hell knows why we do anything. I don't know why I let Mari Mancusi's hairdresser weave purple tinstle in my hair this past weekend. But THERE IT IS!
So HAPPY THANKSGIVING!
Or as we like to say around here, Happy Thanksgivvukah! (Chanukah plays no role in this play. But let me repeat: The Pilgrims are from Holland.)
READ ON AND SEE HOW I WAS DESTINED FOR AUTHORIAL GREATNESS!! This is where the magic began, folks. A 7 year old playing with 5 act structure! WTF!
*please note that the original is in brown crayon. I have typed it here for your ease of reading*
Mary: Oh, we hardly have enough food to last us on the whole trip to Virginia, Sue.
Sue: I know it, Mary, but we will soon be there. We will have good crops and maybe the people there will show us how to make our homes snug inside.
Julie: Sue, we are near to shore now.
Sue: But Julie, all I see is trees and grass and how cold it is out.
Sue: The men are going down on the new land now, Mary.
Mary: But look, what is on the land, Sue?
Sue: Maybe the Indians are going to welcome us.
Julie: I certainly hope they're not angry at us, Sue.
Mary: Julie, listen to what the Captain is saying. All women go to shore.
Julie: Now we are on land, Mary and we must wash our clothes.
Joe: Hey, Jack!
Jack: Yes, Joe, those Indians are pretty friendly!
Joe: Well, let's start building and cutting down trees, Jack. Jack! I've made friends with some Indians.
Sue: We're certainly having a cold winter, Mary.
Mary: And a hard time finding food, too.
Julie: We are having so much snow this winter.
Mary: Now that the winter is over we shall have to thank God by having a feast.
Julie: We shall invite some Indians to share it with us.
Mary; When we are done, some of us shall go back home.
Sue: now we shall start our feast. The turkey is good and the cranberries are delicious.
Julie: Now that we are done, we shall say goodbye to some of us.
Mary: They shall go back to Holland.
All: Good bye. Good bye.